Fleas can be taught nearly anything that a Congressman can.– What is man?
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Mark Twain on Teddy Roosevelt, Abraham Lincoln, King Leopold of the Belgians
“Theodore the man is sane; in fairness we ought to keep in mind that Theodore, as statesman and politician, is insane.”
“This man, in whose heart knowledge and charity had left no room for malice, was marked by Providence as the one to “bind up the Nation’s wounds.”
“Leopold of the Belgians: This moldy and piety-mouthing hypocrite, this bloody monster whose mate is not findable in human history anywhere.”
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A jay hasn’t got any more principle than a Congressman. A jay will lie, a jay will steal, a jay will deceive, a jay will betray; and four times out of five, a jay will go back on his solemnest promise. – What Stumped the Blue Jay
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Shall we ever have a Congress, a majority of whose members are hopelessly insane? Probably not. But it is possible— unquestionably such a thing is possible.– Letter to sister 1869
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A man’s first duty is to his own conscience and honor—the party or the country come second to that.– Letter to W.D. Howells, 1884
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“And he grew up and married, and raised a large family, and brained them all with an ax one night, and got wealthy by all manner of cheating and rascality; and now he is the infernalest wickedest scoundrel in his native village, and is universally respected, and belongs to the legislature.”– The Story of the Bad Little Boy
“When I say I’ll learn (‘Teach’ is not in the river vocabulary) a man the river, I mean it. And you can depend on it, I’ll learn him or kill him.” Life on the Mississippi – Mark Twain
Utilizing a unique and memorable MARK TWAIN acronym, author Conor Cunneen demonstrates what the Dean of American Humorists learned him bout public speakin !