Irishman Speaks - Conor Cunneen

A simple little speech by the great humorous, inspirational keynote speaker Mark Twain.

If meeting planners had been able to Google any of the following terms in Mark Twain’s world, I think he would have popped to the top of the page every time. Humorous Keynote Speaker (does not have to be Chicago based)

Inspirational Funny Keynote Speaker healthcare

Humorous Speaker Sales Conference - Foodservice

Keynote Speaker – Funny, Inspirational (even if not Irish)

Humorous and funny business keynote speakr (sic)

As the brilliant Mark Twain is no longer with us, a good option would be to contact Chicago based Irish keynote speaker, (Humorous, Business, Motivational), Conor Cunneen who will be delighted to work with you to make your next conference or event memorable. Conor will explain his Keynote Speaker Brand Promise: E4 – Energize, Educate, Entertain AND Easy to work with. Contact Conor today to ensure a Top o’ the Morning experience at your next event.

Enjoy this short speech from the greatest business keynote speaker ever.

*************************************************

BOOKS AND BURGLARS

ADDRESS TO THE REDDING (CONN.) LIBRARY ASSOCIATION,

OCTOBER 28, 1908

Suppose this library had been in operation a few weeks ago, and the

burglars who happened along and broke into my house--taking a lot of

things they didn't need, and for that matter which I didn't need--had

first made entry into this institution.

Picture them seated here on the floor, poring by the light of their

dark-lanterns over some of the books they found, and thus absorbing moral

truths and getting a moral uplift. The whole course of their lives would

have been changed. As it was, they kept straight on in their immoral way

and were sent to jail.

For all we know, they may next be sent to Congress.

And, speaking of burglars, let us not speak of them too harshly. Now, I

have known so many burglars--not exactly known, but so many of them have

come near me in my various dwelling-places, that I am disposed to allow

them credit for whatever good qualities they possess.

Chief among these, and, indeed, the only one I just now think of, is

their great care while doing business to avoid disturbing people's sleep.

Noiseless as they may be while at work, however, the effect of their

visitation is to murder sleep later on.

Now we are prepared for these visitors. All sorts of alarm devices have

been put in the house, and the ground for half a mile around it has been

electrified. The burglar who steps within this danger zone will set

loose a bedlam of sounds, and spring into readiness for action our

elaborate system of defences. As for the fate of the trespasser, do not

seek to know that. He will never be heard of more.